WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Randomize
