Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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