Dual....:-)
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
