We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
NoShamevember. You game?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
