so let's talk penis.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize