so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
