Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
