I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Randomize
