ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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