about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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