Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
