3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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