Whats the glycemic index on semen?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
