with your own penis?
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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