shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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