i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
