my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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