i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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