I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
