bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
