You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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