i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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