I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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