There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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