...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Omg I joined a choir last night...
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
