he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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