I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
