I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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