Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
