I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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