I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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