They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
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