Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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