I smell stomach acid.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
