her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
