I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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