I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
