At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
