we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
