Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Randomize