I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
