what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize