I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize