i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
i need some magic done to my vagina
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
