Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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