So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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