haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
