Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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