erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
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