Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
